On the Market
Francisco Torres, UCSB's molested stepchild that's been touched in all the wrong places, may finally become a part of the university-owned residence hall family.
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Opinion
Francisco Torres, UCSB's molested stepchild that's been touched in all the wrong places, may finally become a part of the university-owned residence hall family.
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At the dawn of time, great herds of freshmen roamed the vast expanses of the West. Today their numbers have dwindled to small packs of between 30 and 50 individuals.
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You don't really wanna shower alone, do you?" I never saw myself asking this question of a gorgeous girl without getting slapped in the face. Her reply? "Let's go."
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Hi. My name is Alex Benowitz-Fredericks, and I am mean to freshmen. The basic excuse here is one of basic pecking-order cruelty. But that's just an excuse.
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Despite 50 years of destruction and persecution that have claimed 1.2 million lives and totaled 6000 holy monasteries, the Tibetans still have an undying light in their eyes.
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Welcome back, everyone. I would especially like to take this opportunity to welcome all of this year's freshmen to Manzanita Village.
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When I arrived in Siena this June, I spoke barely a word of Italian and knew virtually nothing about the place I had chosen to spend my summer.
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I was all set to write an informative column this week, when at the last minute someone stole my idea for the staff editorial (See upper left). Bastards.
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There seem to be three broad categories of signs: the vitally important, the theoretically useful and the utterly useless.
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The Opinion page is a hungry beast, and without you, it would be nothing. It dwells here in the middle of the Daily Nexus, five days a week, ranging from an anorexic to a plump four-page spread.
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I am the Weatherhuman - a faceless, genderless entity whose job it is to defend the populace, or at least make them laugh until it doesn't hurt anymore.
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Of all the transfers I have made in Santa Barbara, such as transferring a 12-pack of Natural Ice from the liquor store to my stomach, or transferring myself to the beach, the transfer from SBCC to the...
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