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Living Without Vowels: Move Out When the Roomie Chokes Himself, Chicken

It seems that my friend had come home to find Tim laying naked on the floor of their living room, a ski mask over his head and a noose tied around his throat.
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UCSB Students Ought to Ditch Gail Marshall

Should you sign a petition to retire Ms. Marshall from the political scene? Maybe her replacement will start fixing all the problems in I.V., not just steal your votes.
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Meathead in Training

The containers for weight gain and muscle growth formulas are really large.
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Ghost of Tom Joad

Providing assistance to Isla Vista's homeless may not be a solution to homelessness, if there is such a solution, and it may not be cheap, but it is the decent thing to do.
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Red Tape: ‘Sexual Assault Is Never Okay – Even Against a Car’

Vandalism sucks. And no one is reporting it. Between the years of 1996 and 2000, the number of reported on-campus vandalism incidents ranged between 61 and 76 per year.
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Idiot Hippies Need to Keep Their Flea Bag Dogs Leashed

Is there a leash law on-campus or does UCSB subscribe to the idiotic, hippie-brained idea that dogs should be allowed to roam free?
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I Am the Lizard King!

WH: "Sorry Ray, I was imagining myself as a giant infectious microbe. That's how microbes talk."
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If You Won’t Bother to Read it, Don’t Sign It

My theory was that many people would sign any petition put in front of them, so long as the title sounded good. So I did an experiment.
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Don’t Believe Recall Hype Spewed by Paid Petitioners

I am writing to express my concern over the signatures that were being gathered on campus to put the Gail Marshall recall on the ballot.
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Gail Marshall Betrays I.V. and Needs to be Recalled

With a lot of attention being focused on the signature gatherers and their role in the recall effort, many people are not hearing the true facts behind the recall campaign.
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Students Should Have a Choice in Paying for Fence

On Monday night, our very own Shoreline Preservation Fund took up a proposal asking for $10k-plus to build a permanent fence at Sands Beach to protect the snowy plover.
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All of These Are Deductable

The weatherfund is tapped.
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Club Coverage Was Great, But Don’t Forget the Women, Too

If the Nexus articles are written based on research, the author of the article should have known that last weekend's tournament was not just for men.
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We Need to Stop Giving in to the Demand for More Oil

If, as Stephanie McCoy says, we open up LPNF to drilling and no corporation will take the opportunity, then why is it on the agenda?
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Brine Shrimp Make Flamingos Pink

I have several new friends. Last week I purchased and hatched sea monkeys, the playful sperm-like ambassadors of the deep.
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